The Last Love Letter

Photo by Art Meza @Chicano_Soul

Photo by Art Meza @Chicano_Soul

The Last Love Letter

I never knew exactly what to say to you,
mujer
I still don’t
la Reina de la Muerte
Mictecacihuatl: Queen of Mictlan
I know that you could have killed me
all those years ago
with a flutter of your eyelash
a brush from your lips
a last caress
dead flower petals
falling from your hair
but at the moment of truth you hesitated,
Why?
I may as well be dead
for as long as it’s been
since we shared some pisto
and each other’s company
laughing inside of one another
pressing our souls together
“Beautiful but deadly…” they said
Would killing me softly have solved anything,
Ruca?
Except to sate the appetite of Nuestra Señora de la Muerte?
For she who loves with the heart of a Woman
also requires a heart in return
sangre por sangre
blood in
blood out
I know you have thought about it
often enough with each sunset
reminisced about how you would have put my body
in the trunk of that ranfla
and left it at the bottom of the lake
keeping my essence in a bottle
and swallowing the stars whole
by daybreak
I think about how maybe
I should have sent you one last love letter
Frank Booth style
to protect myself from your evil ways
But mostly I think about the wasted time
and my sacrficed heart
its blood running down the temple
of what we once called our love
I wish there was some way to get it all back
I’d kill you for it
if I really believed it was possible
But I know you’re out there
somewhere, searching for bones
not quite a smile on your face
not quite a look of love either
Lady of the Dead, in waiting
If we ever do cross paths again
just make it quick
porfas
and seal it
with a kiss

c/s

– S|J|R  9-19-14

From the [untitled] forthcoming SJR book due out next year…

Photograph by Art Meza, find him here and get your Chicano Soul prints, shirts, books here!

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